Saturday, January 13, 2007

Thanks for the kick in the nutz


There are days where I really, REALLY wonder if anyone at the corporate level of Red Lobster has actually had to earn a living, work a real life job, struggle to make ends meet and just get by. Our corporate idiots...err...leaders had the brilliant idea to combine yet another low price promotion with a new coupon drop. Thanks, you smashed one testicle, why not get the other?

Our new promotion started this past Tuesday. I didn't blog on it, because quite frankly it is a low quality addition that I am not proud to serve. The have added a new pasta that a commenter asked about in the previous thread. Read my response there if you really want to how I honestly feel about it. Red Lobster calls it the Mediterranean Jumbo Shrimp Linguini -Jumbo shrimp tossed in a garlic-herb butter sauce with artichokes and sautéed onions on a bed of linguini, topped with fresh tomatoes. What is additionally funny is the dumb bastards at corporate aren't smart enough to realize the correct spelling of "Linguini" is linguine. The meal is disgusting, does not look appealing, smells like ass and gives you the not gettin' any tonight breath.

The promotion includes all of our Jumbo Shrimp -Jumbo Garlic Shrimp Scampi, Jumbo Crunch-Fried Shrimp, Garlic-Grilled Jumbo Shrimp, Parrot Bay Jumbo Coconut Shrimp, and as I mentioned above our new Mediterranean Jumbo Shrimp Linguine.

Now I understand we can't always have high dollar meals as our promotions, that would make us a nice restaurant instead of the cheap-assed geezer/ghetto magnet we currently are, and that might not be good for people getting bonuses (meaning none of the working folk). I understand that we can't have a big dollar event immediately preceding our biggest time of the year (Lent) with Lobster Fest on the horizon. But DID YOU HAVE TO ISSUE A FRICKIN' COUPON? Hell no you didn't. Pricks.

And the added back this to our promotional menu:
Red Passion Colada
A deliciously creamy combination of piña colada mix and Alizé Red Passion, an exotic blend of fruit juices and cognac.

Any guesses who the "target" market for that drink is? I'll narrow the field, it's not Asians, Whites, Latinos, American Eskimo, old people or under age people. I think that is poor taste on Red Lobster's decision making team. But what do I know, I'm just a guy in the trenches, wishing he had corporate proof nut cup.


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4 comments:

ktlee said...

Nothing better then the coupons bringing in the best crowd ever. We have that going on as well. Not fun. Good luck!

Brad said...

Did you enjoy the MLK holiday?

Lobster Boy said...

Apparently few people ventured out on MLK night. It was a ghost town in my restaurant. We were busy for something like 15 minutes. One of those nights you suspect everyone stayed home to watch 24.

Lobster Boy

Brad #1 said...

Hehehehe, finally some ire!!

I'm loving it, and loving the fact that I'll never step foot in a RL, ever.

Oh, and that's not because of what you personally say, it's because I hate the place too.