Thursday, March 20, 2008
As a server, I occasionally get to hear some pretty outlandish things from my customers. Often they don't realize I can hear them, or because we are constantly on the move as servers we walk into a conversation before someone realizes we are within hearing distance. Other times people are just dumb asses, and speak way too loud about things they shouldn't be talking about in such a public place. The one below fits into this category. It also falls into the category of funniest things I've ever heard someone say!
A table of two attractive lesbians were in for dinner a while back. I know you're saying "how do you know they were lesbians?", and let's just say I know (the hand holding, gazing into each other eyes, their ongoing conversation). They were seated in the section next to mine, so I wasn't actually waiting on them, but was right next to them for much of their dining experience. Somewhere during their meal they must've gotten on the subject of old flames and ex's. I heard a snippet here and there, but nothing that grabbed my attention.
I was at a neighboring table when I heard a hand slap the table (which caused my head to turn toward the sound) and then the following words just a bit too loud "...and you know what? That bitch gave me crabs!" I was stuck somewhere between shock and laughter as it really caught me off guard. She realized right away that she had said that fairly loud, and immediately began to blush, and I do mean red. And her lover? She laughed! I thought the lady might pee herself she laughed so hard! I'm not too certain how many other people heard her, it was a pretty busy time, but once I made it to the bar I couldn't help but laugh a little. The joys of being a waiter.
Anyone else ever over hear something hilarious?